I Win You Lose

I have been wrecked lately. What wrecked me? The disintegration of relationships between people I know. It happens all the time, but lately it has wrecked me. I was wrecked when a friend told his wife he didn't want to be married anymore. I was wrecked when a teacher was told by his student I have surpassed you. I was wrecked when a teenager quit believing their parents cared about them. I was wrecked when a staff person "planted" a “new” church down the road from his previous church "family" with a group of people who all came from the same church. I was wrecked...well you get the idea. Relationships fall apart around us every day.

I have found a consistent thread running through many of these real life tragedies. Are you ready to find out how wreck most every relationship you have? 

Compare other people's weaknesses to your strengths. 

That's it. Really simple. Sure I admit there are a couple of other easy ways to wreck a relationship, but I have found this practice to be the one we do without even realizing it. 

I am fairly adept at a few things. Things like communication, problem-solving, and telling a story. If I compared you to me in any of those areas most of you will lose. I would wager that you are pretty good at a few things as well. I probably don’t stack up to you in those areas.

If you want to wreck your marriage compare your spouse’s weaknesses to your strengths. So why do we keep doing this?

The only thing I can come up with is that I like to win. I like the things I’m good at; in fact I think the things I’m good at are more important and more valuable to this world than the things you are good at. So when I compare my superior gifts to your inferior gifts I win and you lose.  I like winning and so do apparently a lot of other people.